The First Days After Birth – What Now?

The first days after Idan was born were totally insane for me, and for my wife. It was funny to look around the hospital and see dozens of parents who were a couple during pregnancy up until a moment ago, and now they are holding a baby in their hands.

The initial shock – can't stop smiling 🙂

without a doubt, the first days after birth are shocking. At the hospital, it is easy to see which couples just had a first child (happy, enthusiastic, totally shocked) and couples which have been parents for a while (calm, relaxed, waiting to be released home). We belonged in the first category – enthusiasm, happiness, excitement and at the same time – total shock. What now? Nine months ended in a single moment (well, actually they ended with 12 hours in the delivery room, but who’s counting?). Idan was born at 23:30 (11:30pm). After Idan was sent to the nursery for a bath and examination, Shani was sent to sleep and recover, and me? I found myself driving home at 2am, trying to understand what just happened.

Taking a shower, realizing we have a son, smile on my face. I get in to bed, realize I have a son, I smile, and I can’t sleep. For a few minutes (or hours, not sure) I keep thinking about the new baby (who will be called Idan) and about my poor exhausted wife (who I hope is resting well). My baby’s face pop in to my mind, I smile again, and doze off.

Secondary shock – Stress and Smiles

Morning came quickly. I get up, quick face wash, morning coffee, realize I am a dad, big smile, and I start calculating. At this point the adrenaline is down a bit, and it is time to be practical – there is a house to arrange, there are a lot of baby stuff to bring home from the store, there is a wife to take care of, and an incredibly cute baby to go and see as fast as I can! I get ready quickly, writing down what I have to do – go get Idan’s stuff from the store, get Shani some food, send messages to friends and family, and breathe. You’ll probably laugh, but I wrote down everything. Including breathing. I was more excited than I ever thought I would be, and the mess that I am with ADHD – I took precautions: writing everything down.

During the first three days, while Shani was “hanging out” in the hospital, I took over like an army officer 0 who’s coming to visit and when, what needs to be done, who’s help[ing me out and with what, who is cleaning the house and when the hell am I going to spend time with my son (every given moments, except for doctors’ rounds). After three days in the hospital, Idan Got Jaundice, or what I like to call “get me out of this hospital already!”. Come to think of it, the Jaundice saga left Idan in the hospital for three more days, giving me and Shani some space to regroup and breath. And we needed both.

Shani was discharged from the hospital on Sunday night, with mixed feelings. On the one hand, we have a baby. On the other hand – he is still in the hospital with Jaundice. After a quick shower, we finally had some time to relax, so we sat down on the couch. We realized we had a baby. We both smiled, and then cried for bit because he is in the hospital with Jaundice and we are at home. Then again, we time to get settled – arrange the house, decide what goes where, check if there is something we haven’t bought yet. But most of all, the time Idan was at the hospital gave us some time to ourselves before our new life begins.

The shock is over. A new life begins, and the smiles continue

A week after birth, 4 days after the Jaundice Saga began, and a day after we finally finished preparing the house for Idan – Idan was finally out of the hospital. And this moment, a very happy moment, was also a very weird one due to one thought – “What now?”. A few days ago it was shani and I, waiting for Idan to come. Now, he is here in his cradle, sleeping or crying or just enjoying the attention. And what about us? we were left asking ourselves – What now?

It took us a day or two to get in to the new routine. Feeding, diaper change, sleeping and back to stage one. A week later the Colic started, and that is when it got interesting. Or not. What is certain – we were not bored. With all the visits, phone calls and excitement – we always had something to do.

If you are asking your selves what is the point of this post – there isn’t one. JK, there is. The point is that a baby in its first days is a processing machine – on one side the food enters, and on the other side there is poop. As parents, all you have to do is take care of these two needs. The first few days are hard. It takes time to realize what is going on, how to handle the new situation, who does what and when.

During those days I didn’t realize what was going on – we have a child, but except for enjoying sleeping on us (which we enjoyed, A LOT) nothing happened. It is an awkward phase, but all parents get through it.

what now?

Idan, at the time this post was written, is 3 months old. He is smiling a lot, a very happy kid and laughs more than me and Shani together. I can now say that I realize the change a baby brings in to the family. In the beginning I smiled form just seeing him, today I talk to him, I laugh, and I have a blast with him and with Shani. Yes, he is still a processing machine, and a very efficient one I must say. But he is a processing machine that smiles, laughs, and cooperates with our shenanigans. It took me a month, maybe even two, but now I know exactly what’s going on. I am a dad, Shani is a mother, and Idan is our son. We are a family. It turns out that one plus one does equal three!

Smile, Lauch, be happy and wait for when your baby is two and a half months old. That’s when everything changes 🙂

To read the post in Hebrew click here.